7 Dumb Things We All Say: Smart Ways to Improve Every Relationship by Greg Alcorn

Author:Greg Alcorn [Alcorn, Greg]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: -
Publisher: BookBaby
Published: 2018-12-24T00:00:00+00:00

Ask Questions and Master Listening

SAY THIS NOT THAT

Tell me more I can top that

Tell me your backstory How long have you done your job?

What’s your story? Where are you from?

Start from the beginning When did you meet?

Tell me about him/her How old is he/she?

He was an All-American football player. He was Rowan County’s Athlete of the Year in the mid-1980s. As far as I know, he still holds the record for Division III kickoff and punt return yardages.

That’s Bryan Overcash. Now here is the unusual part of the story: I learned about his athletic prowess about three years after he became our VP of Finance. Three whole years.

Now, it took me about three hours to tell him about my legendary career in Little League baseball. I also was quick to share my storied college basketball career, which lasted a total of two weeks before quitting.

I was on the Cinderella UNC-Charlotte basketball team that made it to the Final Four and barely lost to Marquette. I scored the first basket in the first intersquad game. A few days after that epic layup (and about ten turnovers), I was called to the coaches’ office. Coach Pratt kindly told me I was the seventeenth man on the seventeen-man roster, and the sixteenth guy was player of the year in his home state. He said I would rarely play, if ever, not travel on away games, probably not even play in practice, but I could stay on the team if I wished. Yes, I quit. I joined an intramural team and watched those sixteen guys make history.

Now, look at that previous paragraph. Who’s it about? Me, myself, and I. Did I mention this book is about the dumb things we all say, including me? Yes, I have made my share.

Why are we like this? Why can’t we wait to tell our story, no matter how trivial? What’s worse is not asking for a similar story from someone like Bryan. His story is far more exciting and intriguing to me because I already know my story. More Bryan and Less Greg is a good attitude reminder for Greg.

Also, note that Bryan’s humility is so genuine and real, he would have never told me of his Top 1 Percent career. The only way I learned this was by visiting his house and seeing the trophies, pictures, and articles. Now I tell everybody about him.

I’ve known Bryan for decades, and he’s the epitome of More You, Less Me. His conversation bookends are time-management-principle-based. “I have three questions and one request,” starts his meeting. He goes to lunch and offers to get me something. He sees the trash being taken out and rushes to help. He changes his doctor’s appointment (bad knee, and now you know why) to attend an important client meeting. He’s a you guy.

Oh, and he probably asked me ten questions during my somewhat hyped-up version of my Little League story. Who else hit fourteen home runs in twelve games, batted .678, and pitched two no-hitters? Whoops, there I go again.

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